Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to your house.
Knock knock
Who's there?
THE CHICKEN
When I heard that joke I laughed for like a year and I'm not sure why
No, it's:
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the idiot's house.
* * *
Knock, knock.
Now for my joke, I think I've said it before on a different joke thread but I'll say it again.
A panda walks into a bars and orders a meal. He eats his food, shoots the bartender and exits the bar.
Later that day, the police find the panda and ask him to explain why he shot the man.
The panda simply replies "I'm a panda, look me up in the dictionary."
So the police grab a dictionary and look up panda. It reads: Panda; Eat shoots and leaves.
A good one I read in a book the other week:
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson decide to go on a camping trip. After dinner and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night, and go to sleep.
Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend.
"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
Watson replied, "I see millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?"
Watson pondered for a minute.
"Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets."
"Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo."
"Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three."
"Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant."
"Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow."
"What does it tell you, Holmes?"
Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke: "Watson, you idiot. Someone has stolen our tent!"
* insert laugh track here *
