My channel, saharamojave, has....improving commentary I guess. View the progression between episodes 2 and 5. It
would be helpful to get more comments. I get like one comment per video while other people with less subscribers get 10-20 comments a video.
Comments greatly help improve the
commentary of future videos because then the uploader can talk about what interests his/her current audience.
Some things I need to work on that you could use a a checklist are:
1). Projecting your voice (I tend to mumble)
2). Not get so sidetracke....SQUIRREL! (That's basically the extent of my commentary in episode 2 xD)
3). If something even mildly interesting or unique happens, blow it out of proportion and make a big deal of it. In my 2nd episode, I came back to corn on Vida Cova and the 4th guy left fell and died right in front of me, making me stacked. I made the newbie mistake of going silent. What I should've done, what ThatOnTomahawk or Tobuscus would've done, would be to laugh about it (maybe even show a slo-mo replay or something).
Alpha does an excellent job of utilizing this, as does Tomahawk.